Happy Mother’s Day everyone!! Today is such a special day and I hope you have the opportunity to celebrate your mother or mother figures in your life. To be a mom is so insane to me, I literally don't understand how women do it. Like, how??? Unfortunately I couldn't be with my own mom today (finals suck), but I wanted to take the time to write a little something about the amazing woman I get to to call Mom.
If you don’t know already, I am adopted. I was adopted from China as a small baby. From a young age I was aware of my adoption and barely thought about it, however the concept of a “mother” had been a grey area for me growing up, one I would often find questioning to myself.
Whether I was conscious of this at the time, as a child I felt confused and maybe even doubtful of the identity of my “real” Mom. I questioned the fact that I was biologically brought into this world by another woman half way around the world, who’s appearances I could only assume matched mine, yet raised in California by a tall, grey eyed, blonde haired person I instinctively called Mom. Who should I be loyal to? Did my heart have room to love two mothers? Could I only choose one?
I think for many adopted kids (at least for me personally), there is this feeling of loyalty you have towards your birth mother, even if you have no memory of her. The stranger who birthed me had unknowingly taken up space in my heart, making it harder for me to let others enter. How could you let go of something you never knew? As a child this conflicting feeling held me back from fully and whole heartedly giving and accepting love from my Mom, (a realization I wish had come to me sooner).
But as I’ve grown older and have gained new perspectives on myself and the world, I can now say that there are no words adequate enough to express the love I have for my mom. She is the absolute greatest woman I know and has selflessly guided me to becoming the person I am today. She really has taught me everything I know and from the example she’s set forth, I feel confident in my future self to be a mother to my own children one day.
There are so many incredible things I could say about her, but then we’d be here all day, so instead I’ll just list out my top three lessons I’ve learned from her on how to be a good mother.
1. Work (or don't work)
My Mom has been working my entire life, which I think has been one of the most inspiring things to witness. If ever the time comes for me to have kids, I know making the decision to continue to work and move forward in my career while raising a family, will be a given. The power of working and being (financially) independent is something I think is so valuable, and whatever feelings of “guilt” from having a family should never keep you from achieving your personal/career goals. And that is not to say that fully embracing motherhood and being a mom isn’t a job in it’s own right. It’s probably THE hardest job one could take on. So work hard at whatever it is you decide to do.
2. Stay chic
Style should never be sacrificed just because you have kids. My sense of personal style definitely comes from my Mom, who has always and continues to be one of the most chic women I know. Literally everything she puts on looks amazing. I almost always raid her closet in the hopes of looking as good as she does (but I never do). The effortless grace her outfits manifest themselves into have always inspired me, and I hope to one day be as stylish as she is.
3. Always be kind to everyone
The kindness my mom has not only shown me and my family, but all the other people she interacts with, is how I truly define what it is to be poised. When I say my mom is kind, it’s really more like a Mother Teresa kind of KIND. She is one of the most selfless, open hearted, giving people I know, and her patience and grace amaze me every day.
Also, can we just take a moment to recognize how HOT my parents are? Seriously, they don't age and it's kinda suspicious (the last two pictures are taken nearly 20 years apart!!)!!
So that's all. HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY to my amazing, beautiful, kind, smart, chic, graceful, loving, hilarious, mom. You blow me away every single day, and I hope one day I can do the same for you. Thank you for everything. I LOVE YOU SOOOO MUCH! Eeeee eeee!!